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    Maybe even if you're named something close, Stork or Stack, e.g. The one where I met the woman with histrionic personality disorder who broke my heart? So, herewith, my deeply personal -- by which I mean, as always, super-cranky -- take on dating sites. Jeez, leave a woman somewhere for the rest of us, Draper. : Plenty Of Fish is a wonderful dating site, if you hope to date fish. , all the kids on that one planet came out, bounced balls exactly the same way and went back in at exactly the same time? (Seriously, if I see one more profile in which the person describes him-/herself as a "glass-half-full kinda gal/guy", I will fill their glass with fuming nitric acid and shout "How you like your glass half-full now, huh? While, as noted, presenting as mind-numbingly dull, most of the people on Match are as crazy as several shithouses full of rats. Hell, if your name is Stark on that show, you're probably toast. Because I'm deeply stupid.) And as I considered, it occurred to me that you, my many readers (okay, twelve) (eleven if Harry's still got that case of hysterical blindness), might benefit from my experience with these sites.You did nothing to deserve them and they don’t mean you need to change anything about yourself.

    Conduct Internet searches in order to find out how many members are subscribed, read reviews that may include both good and bad experiences from the site. Does the site provide the name of a real person, or at least a phone number to contact if you have questions? Free sites tend to have more members, which equals more choices, but it also means there’s a higher chance of interacting with a scammer on a these sites.

    Plenty Of Fish combines a horrible circa-1998 user interface with a more or less utter lack of selection criteria, so after squinting at the multitude of low-res pictures and the vaguely- or not-at-all-filled-out profiles, if your dating strategy is anything other than "whoever responds to my thousands of vague spam emails, she will I marry" (it's more of a guy thing), you realize that not only are you barking up the wrong tree, but in fact it's a coat-rack, and you should stop barking because of how you're not a dog. Two more personality disorders on my punchcard (come on, schizotypal!

    Eventually I began dating again, mostly meeting potential sugarboogers online, and I found myself debating which dating site to go with. Remember: your experience may differ, though only if you look a lot like Jon Hamm, in which case, why are you on an online dating site? If you're shooting for a partner a bit higher up the evolutionary ladder (or the fish ladder), not so much. Personality disorders, OCD, bipolar -- if you want to date your way through the DSM IV (and if you're taking an abnormal psych class, there's no better way to memorize the disorders), Match not only offers, but mandates that experience.

    So if you're not sure if you wrote to someone before--and remember, they're all pretty much monozygotic twins--you've got no way to find out.

    Since you're probably just like everyone else on the site, I expect it doesn't much matter. , if ever I get to stop dating, I think I'll miss you most of all.

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