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    Funny quotes on dating and relationships

    - Zimbabwe's president, Robert Mugabe, is currently the third longest serving president in Africa after Teodoro Nguema (Equatorial Guinea) and Eduardo Dos Santos (Angola)- There are several quotes attributed to Robert Mugabe that will make you laugh so hard Zimbabwe's President Robert Mugabe is one of the African leaders who seems to have been in power forever.

    Robert Mugabe was elected as prime minister, head of government, in 1980, then became the first executive head of state in 1987. READ ALSO: This hot Kikuyu girl has the biggest butt in Kisumu (photos) It is said wisdom comes with age, and 92-year-old Mugabe has some wisdom for sure.

    Not only are these hilariously funny love quotes, they're 100 percent spot on, and from some of the world's most famous, influential people to date.1."Real love amounts to withholding the truth, even when you're offered the perfect opportunity to hurt someone's feelings."— David Sedaris​Read: The 23 BEST Donald Trump Memes Online That'll Make You Laugh Bigly! If you're searching for the best quotes and memes to share with the people you love (or just want to feel inspired yourself) ...

    A woman to a man during a slow dance: Is there a gun in your pocket or you’re just happy that we met? If you keep persuading a woman for too long, she will think that talking is the only thing you are good at.

    Love and relationships have always been a goldmine of material for comedians, so it’s not surprising that so many funny love quotes result from comics riffing on romance.

    Whether ensconced in a standup set or a comedy book, funny relationship quotes are a given when a comedian puts pen to paper (or text to tweet) and considers the absurdity that is two humans attempting to love each other.

    READ ALSO: 6 photos of Mercy Kyallo that prove she is hotter than her sister, KTN's Betty Kyallo 11. The problem is when you are lying on his chest then his ribs draw Adidas lines on your face.13. He took a rib from a man and created a loudspeaker.14.

    I need a geek who can get my naked photos off the cloud.” “When I say to a guy, ‘Look, we’ve gotta talk,’ what I really mean is, ‘We’ve been together for months. I don’t drink coffee.” “True love is singing karaoke ‘Under Pressure’ and letting the other person sing the Freddie Mercury part.” “Before I met my husband, I’d never fallen in love.

    Some people are in relationships and they’ve forgotten what happiness is.” —Drake “Being deeply loved by someone gives you the strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.” —Lao Tzu “No girl should ever forget that she doesn’t need anyone who doesn’t need her.”—Marilyn Monroe “She’s my friend because we both know what’s like to have people be jealous of us.” —Cher Horowitz “In my own relationships, I know that I should break up with someone who doesn’t encourage me to be strong and make my own choices and do what’s best in my life, so if you’re dating someone who doesn’t want you to be the best person you can be, you shouldn’t be dating them.” —Veronica Roth “I don’t know any of us who are in relationships that are totally honest—it doesn’t exist.” —Richard Gere “We accept the love we think we deserve.” —Stephen Chbosky “There is nothing I would not do for those who are really my friends.

    I have no notion of loving people by halves, it is not my nature.” —Jane Austen “Three things I want in a relationship: Eyes that won’t cry, lips that won’t lie, and love that won’t die.” —Wiz Khalifa “Never love anyone who treats you like you’re ordinary.” —Oscar Wilde “It’s the friends you can call up at 4 a.m.

    Set them as your i Phone wallpapers, use them as captions on your Instagram photos or just keep them in the back of your mind.

    “The most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself.” —Carrie Bradshaw “Don’t settle for a relationship that won’t let you be yourself.” —Oprah Winfrey “There is nothing better than a friend, unless it is a friend with chocolate.” ―Linda Grayson “The best way to mend a broken heart is time and girlfriends.” —Gwyneth Paltrow “I suffer from girlnextdooritis, where the guy is friends with you and that’s it.” —Taylor Swift “Just because someone is single doesn’t mean they’re lonely.

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