Speaking out of experience, I am nowhere near certain of whether or not my high school relationship was detrimental or advantageous for myself, and it is a question that lingers on the tip of of my tongue countless hours of the day: Is being in a high school relationship honestly worth it?
The initial answer for a still maturing young man such as myself would've been no, but rushing to such an answer is irrational.
“We were only about 100 miles apart, so we were able to see each other on weekends and over the summers, but what happened was because there was so much against us in the beginning, we did try to date other people, and split up," Gee said.
"Our parents insisted that we make sure that we looked at other people, to make sure this relationship would be a strong one.
Relationships are a delicate topic when it comes to any age group, but the high school years are often overlooked, deemed to be not particularly important.
The minds of adolescents are not fully developed and therefore are not capable of knowing what is or isn't beneficial in terms of romanticism at the time.
“It’s definitely possible, but it’s rare, because the chances of you knowing who you want to be with at 40 when you’re 17 are kind of low,” said Tracey Steinberg, a dating coach. And it’s worth the wait if it’s real.” Going the (long) distance is not easy: Challenges including overcoming communication barriers, resisting the temptation of a fun, new social life and scraping together the finances to visit each other at separate schools. But the next time you grumble about a spotty Skype connection or a pricey plane ticket, think about Barbara Gee and Gordon Baranco.
It is much better to have discovered what it is you're looking for in a partner early on in life through experience and looking back to gauge the mistakes made, rather than marry someone not suited for you when you're older and then realize shortly after that you have made an impulsive decision.
Once the romantic infatuation and idealization of in-love wears off for one or both parties, then the commitment to build lasting love on realistic terms through dedication and hard work can be difficult to keep.
So I think it is the loss of “in-love” and the work it takes to grow lasting love are what cause most in-love high school relationships to end." Responding to this question caused me to think further about the challenging issues raised.
FALLING IN-LOVE Falling in-love feels accidental (“falling” for each other) because it usually is.
In a very few cases, eyes meet across a crowded room, and both parties feel instantly smitten; but in most cases falling in-love takes more time.