"We thought being in love meant you weren't supposed to have boundaries." After class, my students shared stories about boundaries being violated - sometimes unknowingly.In my observation from leading meditation and yoga retreats around the country, poorly defined or inappropriate boundaries are the cause of much suffering - and that suffering is compounded for some people by confusion regarding the teachings of oneness, selflessness, and non-separateness.That we have not only the right, but the duty to take responsibility for how we allow others to treat us." "It is important to state our feelings out loud, and to precede the feeling with "I feel." (When we say "I am angry, I'm hurt, etc." we are stating that the feeling is who we are.
SEE ALSO: 8 Simple Ways to Love and Encourage Your Husband However, some people are just really hurting and they’ve never had anyone model a healthy relationship for them. When someone finally takes the time to listen, it all comes pouring out. But does that doesn’t mean you can’t still be a supportive friend. Life is full of trials, and having supportive friends makes the pain significantly more bearable. Sometimes we need people who are trained to deal with our specific needs. When a friend faces challenges, it can be tempting to try to fix things for her. She has a heart for the weary and broken-hearted, holds tightly to her eternal hope in Christ, and values vulnerability over perfection any day.They are a vital part of our being - as a component of the whole.) This is owning the feeling. By stating the feeling out loud we are affirming that we have a right to feelings.We are affirming it to ourselves - and taking responsibility for owning ourselves and our reality.Moreover, your sense of them changes dramatically as you mature and your spiritual life deepens.Even if you've done a lot of spiritual work, you may still allow others to violate your boundaries or you may violate those of others.