As a Chinese, single woman in the UK - where I have rarely come across racism – my East Asian friends and I have encountered a fair share of men with telltale signs of yellow fever.
But it's subtle, and of course, few would admit to surfing online dating sites for Chinese women, yet when the only girls they date are Chinese, then the probabilities are in their favour.
More importantly, while I personally believe that a woman’s worth shouldn’t be connected to the number of guys who fantasize about her at night, this sudden change in how I was perceived by others spoke volumes to me about racial preferences and standards of beauty in Singapore.
The dark skin and curly hair that I was ridiculed for in Singapore were admired and complimented for the first time in my life.
The surprised looks by strangers were one thing, but the harsh comments made to me by fellow Indians, especially men, implying that I had somehow betrayed Indian men as a collective, came as quite a shock to me.
I have been trying to grapple with this response and believe it all boils down, as do most issues, to racism and sexism.
It amused me when another American guy friend made similar comments after he left Beijing.
He can no longer date women as beautiful as those in China, but when he was there, complained that all the Chinese women he dated were hot but stupid, considering their level of English or cultural clashes.
From the Chinese perspective, it might even be encouraged, if nothing else than to improve the quality of life some of its people through the fast track.I wanted to sink into the floor when my teacher in Secondary School declared that she, a Chinese woman, would never date an Indian man.So you can imagine my genuine surprise when I flew to Europe for a university exchange programme and started to be on the receiving end of a fair amount of male attention.Unfortunately, some Chinese women see Western guys as a free ticket to an overseas trip or a foreign passport, but there are gold-diggers anywhere in the world. Many Western guys would like to believe Chinese women date them because they have a more muscular appearance or are bigger in size.It is not true, although I can see how this "theory" feeds their racist ego.